Saturday, 29 October 2016


My ticker is giving me a hard time.  It's unhappy with how I've lived my life and it's now protesting by throwing out PVCs on a regular basis.  These PVCs are usually benign but they leave me feeling light headed and short of breath.  The most common cause is stress. 

I live a life filled with stress and anxiety.  If there isn't something to worry about, I find something.  I feel bad about the past and worry endlessly about the future, all the while missing out on right now.  My heart is telling me it's time to change, to let go of my worry but I don't know how to;  it's so deeply ingrained in my character. 

I guess I need to find a way.

4 comments:

  1. I had a real problem with those several years ago. It was during a really stressful time in my life. I hope you can find the balance and peace you need.

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  2. The knowledge is half the battle. You are a wise woman and will figure it out. Just start with the breath.

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  3. Do you know Stephen Levine? He and his wife, Ondrea Levine worked with the ill and dying and those suffering traumas of various kinds. He/they have a number of books. I think you might really like this opening of the heart meditations. I highly recommend. You can easily find his stuff via Powells, Amazon, etc.

    He did a lot of work around grief. Also his son, Noah, struggled with addiction. Noah is now in recovery and has written his books.

    In looking up Stephen to get some specific recs for you, I discovered he died this year! Wow - I didn't know.

    He has definitely been one of my most important teachers. Not a teacher I met in person but whom I met in books. For many years, I read his books and took them and sort of integrated them into my thinking and living practice.

    He and his wrote a book about living a year as if it were that last. You might find that book interesting, too, given your last post and your work with cancer patients.

    I do have a strong intuition to recommend his opening of the heart meditation. Let me see if I can figure out which book that was in.

    Okay, I just checked the site and see that you can buy CDs of the meditations also. http://levinetalks.com/Shop

    You might like "opening of the heart of the womb" or "healing into life and death."

    in the heart of the womb work, Stephen notes that both the womb and the heart have the same type of muscle tissue... women have, in many ways, two hearts... for this reason.

    anyway... check it out. I have a feeling it will be of help. ZC

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  4. I once had a therapist who introduced me to diaphragmatic breathing (also sometimes called belly breathing) as a means to combat panic attacks. It really worked for me, I try to remember to do this when I feel especially anxious, too. If nothing else, focusing on breathing from the belly instead of the lungs focuses a person on the here and now.

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